And So It Is

And so it is that things are clear for me. It is unbelievable to realize that though there is a person in your life right now that you love and care about so much, they will not always be there. Especially when you want to be with them forever, but they say that they are "not at a place in life where they are ready to be in a relationship" and that it would be "unfair" for them to be in a relationship with you because their plans in life are up in the air. But "it's not you or anything, because I still feel the same way for you, I still love you".
But now I must put my intense emotions and feelings for him aside, even though I don't know if I ever can.
I do know, however, that I cannot go on hoping that something will happen and that one of these days he will wake up and realize he cannot live without me. Because he believes he is doing what God has told him to do. So I have put all of this in God's hands, trusting that He has a plan. He knows whether or not we will end up together one day. No amount of hoping or planning is going to let me take control of that.
So yes, I do love him more than ever. Yes, I do hurt more than ever because he kept saying things to make me believe he had intentions for me. Yes, I have cried more and harder than I ever thought possible. But yes, I do want the best for him.
God, be my strength. Help me to be a friend to him because I care about him so deeply and I want to respect his needs.
So, to you out there that this regards:
I love you more than anything.
And I have to move on.